Priorities.

I'm sorry to my readers I haven't been writing lately. I've inserted a picture of my mother-in-law's five generation picture taken last April.

That's when we learned the cancer was back. She was going to fight it tooth and nail, just to buy some time.

After major surgery and radiation treatment, her body told her to stop; it can't take any more.  It's on her terms now.

She and her family is meeting with hospice tomorrow. 

What do we do?

We make every day with her to be the best in her life. We owe her that.

A gift: The capacity to love.

A few years ago, I read a wonderful little book: "Man's Search for Meaning" by Viktor E. Frankl. He and his wife were Jews sent to separate camps during the horrible Third Reich's terror of WWII. He did not know if his wife was dead or alive (she was murdered). He realized one day in his misery and suffering, it did not matter. What matter was he had known love. What a gift!!! I still draw from that passage to help me appreciate the things that truly matter in my life; the capacity to love.

You're looking at the picture above of my mother-in-law, Shirley. I really should say my "other" mother and a true friend. Shirley had colon cancer surgery over 1 1/2 years ago. It was recommended chemo at that time; but she refused; saying she'll take her chances. Well, it returned - lungs, liver and bones. With treatment; 2 years. Shirley's response: "O.K., I was wrong. Let's do it your way." Treatment starts Monday.

Between Shirley and me, we decided the 2 years given her wasn't enough; "Let's go for 5". Her four daughters don't live close, but they are a loving family. They keep thanking me over and over for being there and for my hardship in caring for Shirley.

Here's the payoff. I'm the lucky one because I am close by and I have received the capacity to love. There's no inconvience. I'm the one that gets to spend time with the one I love.

We're planning now on how to spend this time. So, instead of saying "We should" we are saying "Let's go".